Our relationships with family, friends, partner and those around us can bring us great joy in our life or alternatively enormous grief and trouble. Understanding the part we play in relationships can help us get more from them. People often just see the world differently; two people can look at the same news story, incident in the street or situation close to them and make two completely different interpretations about them. 

Conflict can often arrises from misunderstandings with each party being right but no seeing the others persons point of view. 

Working with a counsellor as an individual can improve your own awareness about relationships and the way they affect you. We can also provide family counselling and couples counselling too. We work with children as young as 4 right up through the ages. Maintaining good relationships in older age can lead to feeling healthier and better supported. It has even been suggested that good relationships prolong life. 

How do conflicts and misunderstandings develop?

To demonstrate this, study the picture below. 

How old, roughly, would you say the the woman in the picture is?

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The correct answer can be in her 20,s and in her 70’s… here is why

If you see the young woman: look at the young woman’s chin and think of it as a large nose, and look at the young woman’s ear and think of it as an eye. If you see the old woman: look at the old woman’s nose, and think of it as the left cheek of a face looking away from you, and look at the old woman’s eye and think of it as an ear on a face looking away from you. Argue how you like the answer is both answers are correct. 

The team at Citizen Counselling can provide one to one support in person, family counselling and couples counselling rom our Counselling Centres in central Birmingham and Jewellery Quarter or via secure phone or video  link. We use a secure web based service similar and as easy to use as Skype but with additional security and encryption features.

What are the symptoms of poor relationships?

Poor relationships cause stress, discomfort, misery and even fear. Where relationships become about power, control and domination they can even be domestic abuse. 

How can better relationship support be treated?

Identifying and understanding our own part in the relationship programme can be an important start. Is it really just be everyone else? we need to check. 

Developing better techniques for better relationships might include increasing confidence, being more assertive, developing more positive behaviours and developing better anger management techniques. We might also need to learn to love ourselves more if the barrier is thinking nobody wants to know us. 

What can Citizen do to help with better relationships?

Citizen provides one to one, couples and family counselling in Birmingham from our counselling centres in Birmingham City Centre and Jewellery Quarter

What if my relationship with a partner or other has deteriorated to the point of abuse?

If you suspect or know that you are in a domestic abuse situation call the 24 hours National Domestic Violence Free Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run by Women’s Aid and Refuge) If you are in immediate physical danger call the Police on 999.

Young woman/old woman Credit

Donaldson, J. (July 2017), “The Young/Old Woman Ambiguous Figure” in F. Macpherson (ed.), The Illusions Index. Retrieved from https://www.illusionsindex.org/i/young-woman-or-old-woman. Creative commons.

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