Monday, December 9, 2019

What’s your anger costing you? It’s not too late to seek support even if things are going a little pear shaped. 

Anger management is basically how to ‘do anger better’ without harming yourself or the people around you. Some of us learned ‘how to do anger’ very early on in life but others went one of two other ways, either we learned to bottle it up or swallow it down leading to frustration and problems expressing anger or lashing out at any perceived threat, real or fictitious. It’s perfectly possible to learn ways of keeping calm in difficult situations. 

The Citizen approach works in both types of anger and looks at three main areas; environment, triggers and understanding others. 

We consider environment because people often ask ‘why am I so calm at work but so angry at home’ (or vice versa)

We look at triggers because we all have our ‘hot buttons’ or ‘sensitive issues’ 

Understanding others is to fully understand how we are in relation to others.

Get these three areas aligned and you will be less angry, less often. 

The team at Citizen Counselling can provide one to one support in person for anger management, from our Counselling Centres in central Birmingham and Jewellery Quarter as well as one day course (includes a certificate of attendance) or via secure phone or video  link. We use a secure web based service similar and as easy to use as Skype but with additional security and encryption features. The My Anger Coach online programme has helped hundreds of people take their first steps in anger management.

What is anger management?

It’s really about learning ways to ‘do anger better’ and learn techniques like assertiveness to take alternative action. This means that you won’t hurt yourself or others.

Is an anger management course the same as a domestic abuse course?

No, these are very different issues and its important to recognise which is the right one for you at this time. Anger management is about controlling our own reactions and looking for alternative ways to deal with issues in a calmer way and can be taught in as little as one day and/or a few counselling sessions. Domestic abuse is more about power and control- it can even be taking delight in hurting others. If you are looking for a Domestic abuse perpetrator programme look for one accredited by Respect. They typically these are run over 26 weeks.

What are the symptoms of anger management?

Anger management is characterised by frequent regular outbursts of anger that result in hurting yourself and or others though the things you say and do. This can be by harming yourself or others, destroying property or items valuable to others and saying horrible hurtful things. You probably soon regret saying or doing these things and cna get overwhelmed.. People with anger management issues can ‘drive away’ the people close to them. People with anger management issues are frequently in denial about it and often take a while to access support. 

Is there a test to see if I am angry?

Our online anger management tool will give you an indication of your anger. Access it for free here.

What can Citizen do to help with anger management?

We first starting running courses for anger management back in 2005 and have helped hundreds of people live ‘a life less angry’. Learning in a small group is a very effective way of getting a fast result. We run the groups regularly in Birmingham on a Friday or Saturday. 

Not everyone can get to Birmingham or wants to work in a group, although it is very effective to do so. As an alternative we have an online programme, My Anger Coach and are able to offer one to one anger management with a counsellor in person or online. You can combine these approached in a ‘made to measure programme’.